And so...popular thinking seems to believe it might be “more Christian” to say, “Love your neighbor more than yourself...’

Or maybe it feels more spiritually palatable to say, “Love your neighbor instead of yourself.”

However, the Bible, bringing Truth at a tangent to our expectations, again, says, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” In fact, the Bible says it eight times over 1,500 years and seven different authors. It’s woven into the fabric of Divine and human relationship as both the calling and the blueprint for interacting with each other.

In the sacred laws of Leviticus, it is tied to not taking retribution into your own hands; not bearing a grudge. (Lev 19.18)

In the first New Testament writing of James, it is called the fulfillment of the highest “Royal law.” (James 2.8)

Paul follows with his angry letter to the backsliding Galatians by summarizing “the whole law” in these words. (Gal 5.14) His theological letter to the Romans wraps up by wrapping up each commandment in this comprehensive summary. (Rom 13.9)

Mark, Matthew, and Luke quote Jesus tying all the commandments together with the chord of loving neighbor as self. And, the second time Jesus is quoted in Matthew, he “hangs” all of the law and the prophets on this “hook” - “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

The encounter led his chief opponents to pull back and lurk for their moment. (Mark 12.31; Matt 19.19; 22.39; Luke 10.27)

Given this Biblical comprehensive and extensive calling over centuries, why is it that there is so little emphasis on Godly love of self? Why isn’t self-care a part of each congregation’s programs and resources? Why are church staff so often pushed beyond God-glorifying boundaries and struggling higher than average stress-related issues?

Consider the conclusions of those who have researched church worker health.

“Members of the clergy now suffer from obesity, hypertension and depression at rates higher than most Americans. In the last decade, their use of antidepressants has risen, while their life expectancy has fallen. Many would change jobs if they could.”

–Paul Vitello, New York Times

“…clergy do not present an exemplary portrait of health and wholeness, and our congregations and ministries are paying for it.”

–Melissa Rudolf, General Board of Pensions and Health Benefits, UMC

This is why “The Love Paradox” (both the book and the ministry which it encourages) exists...to encourage acceptance of God’s paradox and bless you–and your neighbor in the process! By reaching beyond a traditional “Christian self-help “ book, The Love Paradox gives examples of biblical boundaries, biblical self-love, and explores the importance of relationships.